From: Dinner In the Darkroom
Entries Tagged as 'Geek Speak'
Look Closely….
December 29th, 2009 · No Comments
Tags: Geek Speak
A Year in Facebook Statuses
December 28th, 2009 · No Comments
Tags: Geek Speak · Quotes
Can Cellphone cause Brain Cancer – After Many Studies, the Answer is “Maybe”
September 9th, 2009 · 2 Comments
Tags: Geek Speak
Burning Man Live Radio Streams
August 20th, 2009 · No Comments
Burningman live streams…
Tags: Burning Man · Geek Speak · On The Road
Social Media is NOT a Fad.
August 11th, 2009 · No Comments
Consider the following:
* By 2010, Gen Y will outnumber Baby Boomers — 96 percent of them have joined a social network.
* Social media has overtaken porn as the number one activity on the Web.
* One out of eight couples married in the U.S. last year met via social media.
* Years to reach 50 millions users: Radio, 38 years; TV, 13 years; Internet, 4 years; iPod, 3 years. Facebook added 100 million users in less than nine months; iPhone applications hit 1 billion in nine months.
* If Facebook were a country, it would be the world’s fourth largest, between the United States and Indonesia.
* Yet, some sources say China’s QZone is larger, with more than 300 million using their services (Facebook’s ban in China plays into this).
* ComScore indicates that Russia has the most engaged social media audience, with visitors spending 6.6 hours and viewing 1,307 pages per visitor per month — Vkontakte.ru is the number one social network.
* A 2009 U.S. Department of Education study revealed that, on average, online students outperformed those receiving face-to-face instruction.
* One in six higher education students are enrolled in online curriculum.
* Eighty percent of companies use LinkedIn as their primary tool to find employees.
* The fastest growing segment on Facebook is 55- to 65-year-old females.
* Ashton Kutcher and Ellen DeGeneres have more Twitter followers than the entire populations of Ireland, Norway, and Panama.
* Eighty percent of Twitter usage is on mobile devices. People update anywhere, anytime. Imagine what that means for bad customer experiences!
* Generation Y and Z consider e-mail passé. Boston College stopped distributing e-mail addresses to incoming freshmen in 2009.
* What happens in Vegas stays on YouTube, Flickr, Twitter, Facebook…
* YouTube is the second largest search engine in the world.
* Wikipedia has more than 13 million articles. Some studies show it’s more accurate than Encyclopædia Britannica. Seventy-eight percent of these articles are non-English.
* There are more than 200,000,000 blogs.
* Fifty-four percent of bloggers post content or tweet daily.
* Because of the speed in which social media enables communication, word of mouth now becomes world of mouth.
* If you were paid $1 for every time an article was posted on Wikipedia, you would earn $156.23 per hour.
* Facebook users translated the site from English to Spanish via a Wiki in less than two weeks and cost Facebook $0.
* Twenty-five percent of search results for the world’s top 20 largest brands are links to user-generated content.
* Thirty-four percent of bloggers post opinions about products and brands.
* People care more about how their social graph ranks products and services than how Google ranks them.
* Seventy-eight percent of consumers trust peer recommendations.
* Only 14 percent trust advertisements.
* Only 18 percent of traditional TV campaigns generate a positive ROI.
* Ninety percent of TiVo users skip ads.
* Hulu has grown from 63 million total streams in April 2008 to 373 million in April 2009.
* Twenty-five percent of Americans in the past month said they watched a short video on their phone.
* According to Jeff Bezos, 35 percent of book sales on Amazon are for the Kindle when available.
* Twenty-four of the 25 largest newspapers are experiencing record declines in circulation because we no longer search for the news — the news finds us.
* In the near future, we won’t search for products and services; they will find us via social media.
* More than 1.5 million pieces of content (Web links, news stories, blog posts, notes, photos, etc.) are shared on Facebook daily.
* Successful companies in social media act more like Dale Carnegie and less like David Ogilvy — listening first, selling second.
* Successful companies in social media act more like party planners, aggregators, and content providers than traditional advertisers.
Source: http://searchenginewatch.com/3634651.
Tags: Geek Speak
The Ultimate Insult…
July 30th, 2009 · No Comments
In an article talking about Microsoft’s merging with Yahoo’s search services:
In the ultimate insult, even most of Microsoft’s employees used Google to conduct Internet searches from computers on the company’s internal network. “I don’t think they felt like they could be evangelists about the product that we had,” says Yusuf Mehdi, senior vice president for the online audience business group at Microsoft. Now, he says, most Microsoft employees are using Bing.
Too funny!!
Tags: Geek Speak
Thinking about Buying the Palm Pre…
July 17th, 2009 · No Comments
The I saw that Apple blocked the iTunes synching ability of the Palm Pre this morning. Hackers work fast – less than 24 hours, you can synch with iTunes.
Tags: Geek Speak
Genius Adventures at the Apple Store
July 13th, 2009 · 3 Comments
My friend Jay sent me this rant (actually he was alluding to it big time on Facebook):
Apple (Don’t go fuck yourself because we’ve already fucked you) Computer – Specifically the fucking Apple Brainwashed Monkeys that work in the Apple Store at the Florida Mall. Although I’ve seen them in every other Apple Store.
-deep breath-
I bought an iMac for my Chicago Apt last May instead of getting a TV. I needed something that would do it all. They upgraded me to the top of the line 24″ machine and to the wireless keyboard and mouse. I got the Eye TV tuner as well, paid thousands of dollars and hailed a cab to get the fucking thing home. Hooked it all up… Nice… It just worked. For about 2 weeks… then I started getting this error popup every time I booted up. ‘A USB Device is currently drawing too much power. The hub to which it is connected will be deactivated’. Ummm ok.. Do what you have to do… It didn’t appear to make any difference to the way things operated. So, this carried on and at the odd times that I actually rebooted the machine, I clicked through the error.
Fast forward to May (note the purchase time frame above-just past 1 year by 1 day). The error starts pooping up during normal use.. but this time-to make things extra special, the Bluetooth devices stop working. So… no mouse… no keyboard… Makes it pretty fucking difficult to use it… So… I would do a hard reboot… and then, sometimes it would be fine-other times not. I lived with this for a couple weeks as I had a wired mouse and could at least navigate at bit… then in June it got unbearable… Bluetooth would just disappear. Not there… I would have to physically unplug the machine for a time-the reboot it.
So I called Apple. The first person I spoke to wouldn’t go anywhere near my machine until I purchased the Apple Care service plan. Fine I said I would purchase the 3 year plan. OK great that will hundreds of dollars for 2 years of coverage. No-3 year plan. No you see you should have purchased it a year ago… we charge the same no matter when you buy it…. pay for 3 years get 2. I think this is fuckered and decline.
I call back and get someone else who-even though I don’t have the Apple Care plan proceeds to attempt to help me anyway-with a 15 minute limit…
‘Let’s see what we can do in that time’… Nothing as it turns out. But he is convinced it is software related and that if I purchase the plan we could do it and get it fixed. Again I express my concern that I’m paying for 3 years and only getting 2. Yep-that’s the way it is. So, I’m getting a little frustrated here and he says..
‘You know-if you take into the Apple Store they will probably fix it for you right then and there for nothing’. Really-Happy Dance.
So— after suffering through for another couple of weeks.. I pack the thing up (It’s Heavy) and head on down to the mall… Of course I have to lug it through half the mall to get to the Apple store where I’m met by.. Nobody. Too busy you see… On a Thursday… So I walk over to the ‘Genius Bar’ (Most self important fucking name ever). And I wait… And I wait.. Finally I say hey Kasper (his name but he could have been a ghost) I’ve got an appointment and my name is up on the display. Can you help me. His response: ‘You need to have a concierge check you in’. Fuck me is that all it takes… So I ask where is the concierge.. ‘They are the ones in the Orange T-shirts’… So I look around… Not a single fucking orange t-shirt to be seen…. I point this out to Kasper who gives the ‘you are an idiot’ sigh… and says OK-hold on…
And hold on I do.. Right to that fucking Genius Bar… not a genius or drink to be seen but still full of condescension and loathing… (note to file-WINE Bar is the way to go).
30 Minutes after my appointment we get started… haul it out and place it on the bar… Hook it up… and attach a wired mouse and keyboard… Oh-I point out that this is where things go wrong for me using wireless devices.. not to worry-he was wireless devices in the back… and off he goes… yep… for 15 minutes Kasper the Genius is in the back…I can see tons of wireless devices on the shelves but those wont cut it.. we need the ones labeled ‘Backup #1′ in black sharpie on duct tape… I realize they don’t sell label makers at the Apple Store.
So-as it turns out-and I suspected… wired devices… everything works… wireless things go to shit… He sees the problem. He understands…. he checks for a new Bluetooth Chip… in the back.. another 15 minutes away. I’m starting to understand now… just coincidence that breaks last 15 minutes as well, surely… Of course they don’t have the part… So— 90 minutes after my appointment time.. we order parts that should be there within 5 days…. and he suggests I buy a wired keyboard (which I do). We will call you when the parts come in. So I ask-when I do bring it back.. how long to repair it.. ‘1 or 2 days… we might even be able to repair it while you wait’. Great… Pack it up and carry that fucker back through the mall with my brand new $55 keyboard.
This past Friday they call and tell me leave me voice mail telling me the parts are in and that I can bring it back anytime before Thursday. No appointment necessary. Neat-o. I should point out now that at this point the error message is popping up multiple times-all the time-wired devices or not…
Tuesday morning I pack it up and head back down to the mall… Haul it and walk into the store looking for the elusive Concierge… and lo-and-behold.. there she is.. right behind the counter ringing up sales… seems in Appleland Concierge = CASHIER. So I wait… and I wait… Finally I throw out the ‘Excuse me can I check in please’…. ‘Ok just a minute’… So after just a couple minutes (I was expecting break time) she asks me what time my appointment was scheduled for. ‘I don’t have an appointment’. ‘Oh. You need an appointment and we can’t schedule those in the store. You have to do that online.’ I explain the situation and hand her my Apple Care Work Order… She reads, turns to me and says in the cutest, nicest, most-not my problem voice… ‘I’ve never seen one of these and don’t know what to do with it’. My response-as nice as can be-Perhaps someone in a Blue t-shirt will know… So off she goes looking for the Blue t-shirt.. (these are the Geniuses… at least that was what they were wearing the week before). One follows her back, speaks to me, takes my iMac and tells me to ‘Wait’.
So I wait… and wait… only about 10 minutes this time.. and there he is… walking back to me-iMac box in hand… could it be that they actually did the repair ‘while I waited’ as forewarned??? LOL Of course not.. the box was EMPTY! ‘We will call you when it is ready in 1 or 2 days’.
*sigh*
So I take my empty box out to the truck and head home confident that I will have it back soon.
Yesterday (day 2) I call the Apple store… and get Sandy on the phone. Very pleasant girl. She looks up my information… informs me that my parts are there… and that it will be 5-7 days unless I was told otherwise… Yippee Fucking Skippee… ‘I was in fact told it would be 1-2 days’. ‘Oh… and today is day 2′. Shes really good… She tells me that she will put my computer on the Bench and that the ‘Genius is scheduled to be in later that day’. Great. I’ll call back tomorrow.
So today is here… It’s Friday. I want my fucking computer back for the weekend. I was only planning on it being gone 1-2 days…
So I call… and here is where I loose it… I get Anthony on the phone.. ‘Yes I see your computer is here on the bench Mr. Pierre. But we have not had any Geniuses here all week to actually do any work. So I can’t tell you when it will be ready.’
‘What?’
‘Sorry sir, there were supposed to be here but they haven’t shown up. One of them might come in tomorrow but I can’t tell you for sure’.
‘Anthony-You are telling me then that you have no idea when your own staff is scheduled to work?’
‘No, he was scheduled to work yesterday but didn’t make it. He was scheduled to work today, but hasn’t shown up. He is supposed to work tomorrow too but I doubt he will be here.’
Fuck me… How do I get that gig!
‘You need to do better than that Anthony-come on…’
‘What do you want me to say? I don’t know.’
And there it was… in a fucking nut shell.. the most honest fucking answer you’re ever going to get from Apple. I don’t know.
I’m off to the mall-empty box in hand… in case they just throw the parts and computer at me and tell me to fix it myself…
Tags: Geek Speak · On The Road · The Stupid Things People Do
“Fake Steve Jobs” Rants About the New Google Operating System
July 9th, 2009 · No Comments
First of all, I love the blog headline: “Dude, I invented the friggin iPhone. Have you heard of it?”
This particular post concerns how everyone is worked up about this new browser operating system from Google.
Their reasons – and the whole post is HILARIOUS (especially if you’re a geek).
- First of all, nobody seems to appreciate how goddamn hard it is to make an operating system. You don’t just wake up one day and fall out of bed and make one.
- Who in their right mind thinks the world needs yet another desktop operating system?
- They’re aiming this OS (or as we call it, “POS”) at netbooks, at least at first, and in case you hadn’t noticed, the netbook market is fucking tiny and will remain so forever.
- You also may not have noticed, but nobody uses Chrome. I mean think about it. Do you know anyone who uses Chrome? Really? And you know why nobody uses Chrome? Because Chrome is shit.
- How many new goddamn operating systems are they going to create? They’ve already got Android, and nobody wants it. Now they’re going to make yet another operating system, this time out of a browser that nobody wants. What’s next? A Gmail-based operating system? A YouTube-based operating system?
- It’s going to be free. So what’s the point? I mean I understand the idea of a loss leader. We don’t charge for iTunes. You’ll notice, however, that we do charge money for music and hardware. But how does this concept apply to Chrome OS? Somehow if you put out a new operating system you’ll get more people using the Internet and then you’ll be able to sell more of those shitty little ads? Forgive me if I’m missing something here, but I don’t see how a free OS or a free browser helps Google.
- The only people who are pushing for this are the hardware OEMs and ODMs and they’re only doing it so they can get a bargaining chip on the Borg. They don’t want to use Chrome, or Android, or Linux. They want Windows. They just don’t want to pay for it. Whatever Microsoft wants to charge for Windows 7, the hardware guys want to pay less.
- People are starting to realize that Google is not their friend, and that all this “free stuff” from Google is not about a) philanthropy, or b) keeping Microsoft honest, but really about c) helping Google gain even more control over what you do on the Internet.
Tags: Geek Speak
Eight Cool things about Star Trek.
June 15th, 2009 · No Comments
Eight Cool things about Star Trek.
http://www.neatorama.com/2009/06/15/8-starship-enterprise-facts-every-trekker-should-know/
Tags: Geek Speak